Have you ever?

Have you ever liked someone so much it literally hurts? Have you ever been someone that is so guarded, and comes off as being so heartless when in reality you love so hard? Have you ever seen yourself losing your pride and becoming a clingy person to protect the relationships you have? Are you insecure? Are you scared? I am too. I am losing myself. I am trying to protect a relationship that is useless to protect. He doesn’t text me, he doesn’t call me. I chase him. I chase him like a bitch in heat. I look pathetic, but what’s worse, I don’t care. . . I’m that heartless bitch that claims love is stupid, and that it’s just a nonexistent concept idolized through materialistic objects rather then the heart. I love so hard. When I like someone I attach myself and don’t want to let go. I act like nothing bothers me when in reality it is killing me. I’ve lost my sanity, I just don’t care. I’m numb. I hate being weak, I hate looking weak and I hate looking like a girl that needs someone. I take pride in the fact that I’m independent. I don’t know why I even made this post. I haven’t posted in a while due to bullshit I’m dealing with but I can’t stop doing what I love.
Xoxo